第18章 爱无处不在（第2页）

我开始珍视我所主持的“誓言”专栏。我听到的每一个故事都证实了，乐观、魄力、风度、般配的伴侣和运气都可以为我们带来爱情，而它也的确存在。我认为，爱情不是虚幻，也非爱情小说或神话故事里的素材，它就像地铁一样真切、准时，只要你能坚持在月台上等待，它终会到来。那时，你一定不会错过它。

&olearnaboutloveindangschool，atage12。IrememberthinkidayIwasgoingtofallmadlyihoheboysaheyearsofmylifekissingandwaltzing。

Duringclass，however，Isatamongthegirls，waitingforaboytoaskmetodaomypleteshock，Iwastlyoobeasked。AtfirstIthoughttheboyshadmadeaterriblemistake。Iwassofuny，andIcouldbeateveryoennisandclimbtreesfasterthanacat。Whydidn'ttheydashto>

&classafterclass。Iwatchedboysdressedinblueblazersandgraypairlsiswhoseperfeytailsswungbadforthlikemetroheyfelleasilyihoherinawaythatletelymysterioustome。Icametobelievethatlovebeloothosewhoglided，whonevershimmieduptreesoreveouchedtheground。

BythetimeIwas13，Ikosubtlytiltmyheadaearsfallbayeyes，insteadofdownmycheeks，whennooodance。Ialsodiscoveredthe"powerroom"，whichbecamemysoftlylight，reliableretreat。Wheedtocry，I'dexcusemyselfandruninthere，

Ifinallystwhe，whowasquietandhungoutoheroom。Whehefirsttime，hewouldn'tevenlookatmeihewasdhetoldgreatstories。Webecamegoodbuddies，dangeverydailtheendofschool。Ilearnedfromhimmymostimportantearlylessonaboutromahepotentialforloveexistsihemostunlikelyaswellasthemostobviousplaces。

ForyearsmylovelifeuedtobeoragiicollegeIfelliallEnglishmajorwhorodeamotorcyeuponoursixthdate—anafternoonofskydivioftheplanealoneandlandedinaparkinglot。

Inmymid-20sImovedtoNewYorkCitywhereloveisashardtofindasalegalparkingspot。MyfirstValentine'sDaythere，IwentooacrowdedbaroSide。Halfwaythroughdieexcusedhimselfaurned。

Atthetime，Ilivedwithabeautifulroommate。Flowerspiledupatourdoorlikesnowdrifts，aontheansweringmaealwaysblinkedinapanickyway，overloadedwithmessagesfromheradmirers。Limousiside，withdateswaitingforherbehindtintedwindows。

Inmymind，lovewassomethiintedarition，partshadow，definitelyunreachable。Wheedhappy-lookingcouples，I'dwoheyfoundlove，andwanttofollowthemhomefortheanswer。

AfterafewyearsiyIgotmydreamjaboutweddingsfazinecalled7Days。IhadtofiingengageddwriteuptheirlottoasktersthethingsI'dalwayswaoknow。

Ifouoothequestion"Howdoyouknowit'slove？"Youkheeverydaythingssurroundingyou—theleaves，theshadeoflightinthesky，abowlofstrawberries—suddehakiy。

Youkiailsaboutanotherpersoareinsignifiostpeople，seemfasgaoyou。Ooldmehelabouthisfuturewife，fromherhandwritingtothewayshescrattheirapartmentdoor，likeashee。Onebridesaidshefellihherfiancebecause"O，amothwasflyingaroundalightbulb，aitathewindow。Isaid，'Thatisit。Heistheguy。'"

Youalsoknowit'slovewhenyou'tstoptalkiher。AlmosteverycoupleI'veeverihatoorseddate，theytalkedforhoursandhours。Forsome，fallinginloveislikewalkingintoasoundproofalbooth，aplacewhereyoutellall。

Findinglovebelikedisgagildedballroomohersideyapartment，aimelikefindingapairofgreatoldbluejeansthatareexactlyyoursizeandseemasifyou'vewornthemforever。I'ttellyouhowmaoldmetheykheywereiheyfottoaroundtheirboyfrieheyfellateasehangingaroundhiminflannelpajamas。There'ssomemoderntruthtoderella'stale—it'slovewhenyou'veincrediblyfortable，thesperfectly。

Finally，Ithinkyou'veinloveifyoumakeeachhattheveryworsttimes—whentheIRSisauditingyouorwhenyavertibleinarainstormorwhenyourhairisturninggray。Assomeooldme，90pertofbeinginloveismakiher'slivesfunnierahewaytothedeathbed。

SevenyearsagoIstartedwritingaboutloveandweddingsfortheimesina;Vows"。AndnowthatIhavebeenonthisf，astrahinghashappened：I'msideredaohis，loveisstillmostlyamysterytome。TheonlythingIfidentlysayisthis：Loveisasplentifulasoxygen。Youdon'thavetobethin，naturallyblond，super-successful，soed，knowledgeableaboutpolitiparticularlygtofindit。

I'veintervielenontheirlueveryway—aballerinawithis，aphysicistwhohadbeeed）disastrousblinddates，aetplayerwhowasasingledadandcouldbarelypaytherent。Butlove，whentheyfoundit，broughthumor，dlelight，home-eals，fuure，poetryandloionsintotheirlives。

Whenpeopleaskmewheretofiellastoryaboutoneofmyfirstjobiwaswithaafamazine。Ihadnoexperienceorskills，andhedidn'tforonesesiderhirihegavemesomeadviceIwill。Hesaid，"Gooutintotheworld。Workhardaeonwhatyoulovet。Ifyoubeegood，wewillfindyou。"

That'seoplelookingforlovetowaitforthat"Iwoery"feeling—ait！Don'treadarticlesaboutho，seduotizeamate。Don'tworryaboutyourlipstickht，becauseit'snotgoingtomatter。Justliveyourlifewell，takecareofyourself，anddon'thopetoomuch。Lovewillfindyou。

&uallyiteve28，Imetmyhusband。Atastatioore，Iwasbuyierribbon，andhewaslookingatFilofaxes。Irememberthathiseyesperfectlymatchedhisfadedjeahatmysneakerswerefullofsaalksaboutthosesneakersandhowtheyevokedhischildhood—boheonthesandinahosethingsthathecherished。

HowdidIknowthatitwastruelove？Ourfirstrealdatelastedforninehours：wejust'tstoptalking。Ihadodanmylife，butIcewithhim，perfestep。Ihavelear'slovewhenyoufinallystoveryourtoes。

&erwemet，>

Ihaveetocherishwriti;Vows"oryIhear，Ihaveproofthatlove，optimism，guts，grace，perfeersandgoodlufact，exist。Love，inmyopinion，isnotafantasy，uffofromanovelsorfairytales。It'sasgrittyahesubway，itesaroundjustasregularly，andaslongasyoustickitoutoform，youwon'tmissit。